I was raised in a family that emphasized our being Jewish, but rejected religious observance. I fulfilled my parents' hopes by excelling in school, marrying a nice Jewish boy, and giving them a grandson and a granddaughter. I exceeded their expectations by earning a Ph.D. and becoming a university faculty member. They were proud of me and confident in my success until about ten years ago, when I became interested in Jewish practice.

My interest in Judaism began when my son approached bar mitzvah. My determination to celebrate his bar mitzvah surprised me and amazed my family. My son was happy to meet with a tutor for a year, and I found a congregation that accepted this arrangement as adequate preparation.

The congregation's additional requirement stipulated that each family produce its own prayer book for the service. I was told to include the "important standard parts" but could also include poems and songs that suited our family. I was overwhelmed! The only Saturday morning service I ever attended was my brother's bar mitzvah twenty years earlier, so I couldn't begin to guess what the "important standard parts" might be.

Fortunately, a group of congregants met every Saturday morning, and I joined this informal service. We used booklets from previous bar mitzvah services, read the Torah scroll, discussed the Torah portion (sometimes heatedly), and enjoyed wine and cookies together after the service.

At first I was self-conscious about my abysmal ignorance. But although most of the people in the room knew more than I did, none of us knew very much. My family and I eventually produced a booklet and celebrated my son's bar mitzvah together. But even after achieving my goal, I did not stop attending services. I loved the prayers, loved the Torah discussion, and I loved setting aside this time in a special way. This was an unanticipated consequence!

My growth continued when I met an Orthodox rabbi from Baltimore, whom I called with all my questions. He answered me patiently, and recommended books to read. I began to grow slowly, always keeping 'shalom bayis' -peace in the home -- as a high priority.

My family was, at first, tolerant: "Remember when she took up tennis and played three nights a week. That passed, and this will too, if we are patient." Their tolerance soon turned to alarm: "This is getting worse, not better. Now she wants to have a nice dinner every Friday night." Eventually they became incredulous. "I thought you were too smart for this sort of thing" -- and a bit angry: "But we always used to go shopping Saturday afternoon." Finally they became more understanding: "I can see the mitzvot make you happy," and even a little p roud: "My mother always eats kosher food. She's very strict about it."

Ten years ago, Hillel and Chanie Baron established the Center for Jewish Education, and made wonderful improvements in our community. My husband now attends services regularly and is active in the congregation.

Even my parents, who were the least understanding, have softened their rejection of my choice to become observant. Still, given their previous reactions, I did not tell them that I planned to attend Machon Chana.

My week in Crown Heights exceeded all expectations. I was unprepared for the intensity of my experience, -the learning was extraordinary!

As an academic, I study and teach for a living and I love intellectual challenges. My teachers at Machon Chana provided learning that challenged me to think deeply about new ideas and to make sense of difficult concepts.

So much for the myth that observant women are not intellectually active.

Spiritually, my week at Machon Chana deepened and extended my Torah life.

My female teachers were role models of modest, learned, caring women who taught as much by their example as by their lectures. Their energy, their optimism, their focus and their certainty lifted us to new levels of understanding and commitment.

Socially, I also enjoyed meeting other students, and being part of the hustle and bustle of the Crown Heights community.

We spent our days learning, talking, attending lectures and discussion groups, shopping, and talking some more. The days were long and we were busy. I thought I'd need a week at home to recover, but this was not the case. I left energized.

I returned with a zest for doing mitzvot that amazed me. My exhilaration has lasted and the effects of my week at Machon Chana are still being realized.