Freedom
Passover marks our liberation from the land of Egypt, which we refer to by the Hebrew name Mizraim (Egypt). The word Mizraim is related to the word "metzar," which means limitation or boundary. Passover is thus an opportune time to discuss problems that can be caused by personal limitation and restriction. Passover inspires us to break free from our limitations and strive for liberation in our everyday life.

There are many forms of personal limitations, but I wish to discuss here certain psychological traps with a limiting, blocking effect, that restrict a person from fully expressing him/herself.

Low Self Esteem
Very high on this negative list is low self esteem.

Low self esteem can bind, entrap and limit all aspects of our lives. We don't value ourselves as we should, and even tend to devalue ourselves. We fail to value our souls, the deepest, most profound and most 'real' part of ourselves.

Yes, we know that we have a soul, and if someone suggested that we didn't have one; we would be very insulted. Yet, do we care for our souls? Do we have any notion what our souls need? Do we appreciate the potential power of what we can achieve?

A person who does not consider him/herself as important, does not see his/her work as important. Theoretically, G-d cares for us, but he doesn't feel that his prayer or mitzva is of any worth.

"Does G-d really care what I do?"

Yes He does. If we had even a glimmer of how much it matters we would be doing Mitzvot to the max. Unfortunately, we don't realize that the Mitzva we do affects not only ourselves, but the whole world. Realizing the importance of each word of Torah, prayer and mitzva, allows us to see the situation in a new light.

Rush and Tension
Another thing that can limit us is tension, when the person is always in such a rush and cannot relax.

We pray at tremendous speed within a given time and our me ssage is, loud and clear: "Please G-d, don't interrupt me. I am too busy praying. Don't interrupt me with feelings of love or devotion. I am trying my very best to finish this prayer!"

This might sound absurd, but it has a ring of truth.

A person must live in the here and now, not ten minutes ahead of himself; concentrating now on what he has to do next.

Living ahead of himself, always tense and in a rush, means that while he is praying he is eating breakfast; while he is eating breakfast he is driving to work; on the way to work he is at work, and so on.

People should pause and try to "BE" exactly where they are. When they are eating they should be eating; when they are praying they should be praying.

By doing each thing in its own time, life slows down and doesn't not rush past us. In fact, we will find that we have more time than we ever imagined.

Medical students often ask me how to convey caring and interest to a patient when they only have an average of about seven minutes at their bedside.

I tell them that instead of arriving in a "rush" and being tense for the seven minutes they can "glue their feet to the floor" and BE with the patient. If they speak more slowly, the patient feels a sense of timelessness rather than of rush. Then, after the exact same seven minutes, they can move on to the next patient. We know more or less how much time it takes us to say our prayers. One can encapsulate the prayers into that time where nothing else matters or exists. The difference is incredible.

Distant and Remote
A person can limit himself by feeling that G-d is very distant and "Far away."

He prays, says all the words, but as far as his heart is concerned, he might as well be reading the telephone directory in a foreign language.

It is, of course, impossible for G-d to be distant because G-d is everywhere and in everything. G-d is real and present and listening. It is only our own feelings that make us feel G-d is distant, but that is our own misperception. G-d is actually closer than we can imagine, closer to ourselves than we are.

Guilt Feelings
Guilt feelings can also erect walls between G-d and ourselves.

True, guilt can have a positive effect by leading us to repentance. But after we have repented and changed our ways, we may still pray half heartedly because "how could G-d want to be close to us after all that?"

That too, can be improved once there is insight.

Anger
Anger is destructive; not only to the person we are angry with, but also to ourselves.

"Anger and bitterness do far more harm to the vessel in which it is stored, than to the vessel over which it is poured."

Anger takes its toll, and we must somehow confront it and let it go.

Depression
The last thing I will mention is the non-pathological experience of depression. Depression is not a sin; but it can pull us down to lower depths than any sin.

Depression causes doubt and despair and clouds our faith and trust. This is something a person can fight and must fight.

Being happy is a discipline just as being in love with one's husband or wife is a discipline, just as loving G-d is a discipline. A discipline of mind and heart, it is well within our reach.

We don't HAVE to think depressive thoughts or go on depressive 'trips'. We don't HAVE to be sucked into the morass of self pity and of disillusionment. We don't HAVE to feel that the pseudo reality of the physical world is the ultimate reality.

Working on these feelings can begin to liberate us from our limitations and free us from distractions that hinder us from serving G-d with joy.

By Ruth Benjamin, Senior Clinical Psychologist, Johannesburg Hospital. Lecturer, Dept. Psychiatry Medical School, University of Witwatersrand, Johannesburg