I smile when I see their alarm. Most people have spent the largest portion of their youth in their parents' homes, yet now as adults they can't imagine spending more than a few days with Mom and Dad. Although Linda and I are fast approaching 50, my parents have never stopped teaching us lessons about life. From how to properly cut the lawn (yes, there is a good way and a bad way) to how to cook up a tasty kugel, my parents continue to share their wisdom, experience and love with us. Usually, our three months together fly by very quickly.

A most rewarding aspect of this last visit was watching Linda and my mother light Shabbos candles together. Now that may not sound like a big deal to some, but it sure was for me. I grew up in a warm and loving environment, but Shabbos candles were not a part of it.

As a child, Mom occasionally told me stories of what Shabbos was like in her grandmother's home. I could almost smell the challah and taste the kugel as she vividly shared her cherished memories. Unfortunately, Grandpa Charlie and Grandma Lena Cooper passed away when I was very young, and with them went the kugel, the challah and the Shabbos candles.

Mom and Dad's involvement with candle lighting gradually grew as the months of their visit passed. When my parents first arrived, they kind of stood in the background and watched as Linda lit the candles, said the blessing and covered her eyes. But after a few weeks, to quote my children, my parents started to "get into it."

With a little encouragement Mom stood next to Linda and they lit the candles together. Several weeks later Mom asked for her own candles as Linda recited the blessing. A few more weeks and Mom was saying the blessing by herself, extending her own personal welcome to the Shabbos Queen. My father "got into it" too, watching with pride as Mom lit her candles.

Later, he asked me for his own Kiddush cup and chanted the blessing with me. He even joined me in a little "l'chaim" drink after the gefilte fish, and for the first time in 72 years really relaxed on Saturday. When Mom and Dad returned north, I figured that these new routines would be abandoned as soon as they settled back into their old ones. But that first Friday, my mother called about a half hour before Shabbos and asked me to repeat the candle lighting blessing to make sure she had it right, much to my surprise and delight. She hurriedly exclaimed, "Okay, I have to go now. It's almost time to light the candles."

As I hung up the phone I couldn't believe what I just heard. Mom and Dad were excited about lighting Shabbos candles! To my knowledge, it was the first time the glow of Shabbos lights illuminated their home. Is this that "Returning the heart of parents through their children" the Torah was referring to?

I then realized that they had just taught us a most valuable lesson of life, right up there with the lawn mowing! They say that you can't teach an old dog new tricks, but it's different with people. My parents taught me that we are never too old for personal growth and change.

"The longest journey begins with the first step." My entire family embarked on an exciting journey this year. None of us knows where it will end. But one thing is sure: somewhere, someplace, Great-Grandpa Charlie and Great-Grandma Lena are smiling from ear to ear as their grandchildren and great-grandchildren embrace the joy of Shabbos.